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DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

 

1A Children and Childhood

• What did you find helpful or interesting in this section of the film?
• What are the personalities of your own children?
• What do you think children most need from their parents?

 

1B Parenting and Family Life

• What did you find helpful or interesting in this section of the film?
• What are some of the joys and difficulties of being a parent?
• What advice and encouragement would you give to new parents?

 

SOME KEY IDEAS FROM THE SESSION

Welcome to Sycamore. Welcome to this series about parenting and family life. Being a parent is such a beautiful vocation. Children are such a gift, and they can bring so much joy. But there are many challenges as well. It’s not easy being a parent today.

We hope these films will encourage you, and give you food for thought. We’ve simply collected together ideas that other parents have shared with us, based on their experiences of bringing up their own children.

This is not a checklist of things you have to do. Every family is unique, and you have to find your own way of doing things. What works for one person might not work for another. But there might be something here that speaks to you and gets you thinking.

We hope you enjoy the films. And above all we hope you can have some good discussion afterwards, with family and friends and other parents you know. What do you agree with? What do you disagree with? What works for you? What could make a difference to your family life?

Children are an extraordinary gift. Perhaps you hoped for a child. Perhaps this one came unexpectedly. Either way, this unique person is entrusted to you, to your love and care.

On the one hand, this child is yours – with your genes, probably your surname, many of your looks and mannerisms. On the other hand, this child is completely unique – with their own personality, their own needs and interests, their own likes and dislikes.

And they are a child of God – loved by God, made in his image, close to him now, and destined for a life with him for all eternity.

If you put love at the very centre of your family life, it will be a foundation for everything else that happens. Love your children without reserve, no matter how inadequate you feel. You can make your home a place of love and acceptance for all who visit there. And in this way your children will grow up to be loving people themselves.

Your own love will always be insufficient. So ask God to fill you with his love, and to give you all the extra love you need for your children. You are not alone. God loves you and your children even more than you do, and he never ceases to help you.

Parenting is a lifelong vocation. You are doing one of the most important things in the world, and there is no one who can do it for your family as well as you. Don’t waste time comparing yourself to other parents, or comparing your children to other children. God has given these unique human beings to you – and he knows what he’s doing. No child, in God’s eyes, is an accident. You can be grateful for your children, even when things are tough.

Yes, you can seek advice from friends, family, and from books like this. But then make your own decisions and trust your instincts. Don’t be alarmed when other parents do things differently from you. You know your child and yourself better than anyone else. Once you have decided on a certain path, be confident about that, and don’t kill yourself worrying about whether you have made the perfect decision or not. It may not be perfect, but at least it will help you to go forward, instead of being paralysed.